Let Me Introduce You To My Husband


This is my husband, Jay.

He was born on June 1st, 1966 in Auckland New Zealand.

His full name was Jason Romolo Hotere. Hotere like his uncle Ralph Hotere the artist. Romolo was a Christian namesake from another uncle (who lived in Italy and had a son there who’s name was Romolo), Jason as in a TV character from the 60’s, who his mum really liked. But everyone that knew him called him Jay.

Jay was a Maori. A big Maori with a heart of soft gold, sweet and velvety sprinkled with lots of golden hard bits, just like hockey pockey ice-cream, which was his favourite.

Jay was the funniest man I know. He had a naughty/nice sense of humour. He was the most amazing, caring and involved father and the most loving, respectful and supportive husband. He was a very loyal friend. He had mana - a kind of dignity, authority and inner strength that can’t be faked. And yet he was humble and always served others.

He was the kindest, most caring, most loving man I’ve ever know. He had this beautiful smile that warmed my heart and a booming laughter that made other people laugh too.

Jay was generous, welcoming, compassionate and he gave the best foot massages.

Jay was a hugger.

Jay loved Jesus and he cared about people, truly cared about people. So much so that he was a missionary for many years and then he became a counsellor to help others, especially kids from rough backgrounds like himself.

Jay was very stubborned. Sometimes he was too hard on himself and he wasn’t very good at looking after himself because he always put others first. He was not very good with money either, he always shares what he had with people who had less. His immense generosity was a great character trait but it sometimes annoyed me because I always wanted to save money and he never listened to me in that area. He was adamant that the little had we should share with those who had less. Then he would find extra work to make ends meet.

So, yes, Jay drove me crazy sometimes. But he was my greatest cheerleader and he loved me and our girls unconditionally, even when we were a pain in the ass.

Jay was my best friend, my rock, and the love of my life.

There is so much more I could say about my husband, but I would have to write a book to do him justice. Instead, I would love if you would watch his video. I’d love for you to hear his voice, see his smile, and get a sense for yourself of how awesome my husband was.